Let’s face it, if you’re new to the Sunshine State, you may be in for a shock. If you’re born and bred, you know the drill but maybe you need a kick start to snap you out of your curmudgeonly ways. Permit me to state the obvious. Getting jingle bells deep into the spirit of things may prove difficult when it’s 80 degrees outside and you’re replacing burned out bulbs in a plastic Rudolph’s nose. A snowy Christmas morning is a pipe dream destination holiday and the sooner you accept that, the easier it will be to move beyond it. For all the ways Thanksgiving and Christmas in a sub-tropical climate can weigh you down, there are some silver linings and a few good ways to navigate the last six weeks of the year. I, myself, am a transplant from a state with four seasons and I’ve had to come to terms with the atypical, palm laden, holiday hullabaloo. Below I’m listing 10 semi-pro tips to keep you from going off the deep end and assaulting a shopping mall Santa.
#1. Ignore What You’re Supposed to Do and Do What You Want to Do.
I had a thought the other day- How much of what we do in life is motivated by the expectations of others instead of what we might actually want to do ourselves? “You can’t put up Christmas decorations before Thanksgiving.” Why? How could it possibly matter? Here’s an idea- Put your decorations up whenever you feel like it and then make a toast to your deviation from the social norms.
#2. Accept the Weather for What it is. You Can’t Change it Anyway.
I moved to Florida in 2015. Every year, I’ve put up the Christmas lights in shorts and a t-shirt. At first it sort of annoyed me, but after working one too many winters up north and having to drive daily in the snow, I’m grateful that we aren’t dealing with that nonsense down here. December is a roll of the dice when it comes to what temperature to expect. It can be in the 60’s one day and the 80’s the next. If it’s hot go to the beach, the crowds are minimal this time of year. If it’s cool, build a campfire, you don’t get many chances to do that comfortably around here so enjoy it. In short, be adaptable. Control the things you can, namely your attitude.
#3. Watch a Game. Watch All the Games
This is a great time of the year to gather your friends and watch football, basketball, hockey, curling, etc. Whatever your cup o’ tea may be, drink up. Some of you may not be into sports and that’s alright but here’s a not-so-secret secret- The game is just a good excuse to get together. Make good food. They’re gonna remember Karen’s buffalo chicken dip before they remember the score of the game anyway. NFL games on Thanksgiving Day, College Football rivals week the Sat. after, conference championships, bowl season, etc. Get after it.
#4. Start a New Tradition
Last year, my wife and I found ourselves in a position of being torn with so many obligations on Thanksgiving Day. With trying to see everyone in our extended families, we always felt like we were leaving someone out or not doing right by someone in some way and we finally said, “We have to do what’s best for ourselves and our daughter.” We had some friends of similar ages who were in the same predicament. We decided to get together with them and some other friends and we spent the holiday in a cabin on the Tennessee River. We still saw our families before and after, but it relieved the pressure of trying to be everywhere at once and we created our own tradition. Those friends are now coming to Florida for Thanksgiving this year.
#5. Give of Yourself
Most of our problems with the holidays are essentially first world problems. There’s many, MANY opportunities to do something for someone less fortunate than yourself. It’s easy, especially when we’re younger, to get caught up in what we’re getting for Christmas. As I get older, the importance of what I’m giving during this season becomes more clear. The one thing every individual that reads this can afford to give is their time and, coincidentally, it’s the most valuable thing you can give. I volunteered at a soup kitchen a several years back on Thanksgiving Day for a few hours and it’s one of the best Thanksgivings I can remember. The people being served were so grateful and it didn’t cost me a penny, just a few hours of my time.
#6 Entertain Friends
My wife is an excellent host. She loves having people over and making a big fuss about it. She’s pretty great at it. I’m not. I’m sort of a hermit. I like people just fine but if left to my own devices, I’d just assume to go to the garage and piddle around with whatever out there. She’s good for me in that regard because once people are at my house, I end up having a good time. With all of our extended family living out of state, last Christmas Eve we hosted a small party at our house for anyone in a similar situation or really just anyone that wanted to visit. We had 15 or 20 folks come over and it was a great time. Do more of that, you’ll enjoy it. The garage will still be there when they leave.
#7. If You Don’t Watch Christmas Movies, Do Watch Christmas Movies.
A Christmas Story. Christmas Vacation. Home Alone. How the Grinch Stole Christmas. Elf. Four Christmases. The Nightmare Before Christmas. The Santa Clause. Die Hard. Gremlins. White Christmas. Scrooged. It’s a Wonderful Life. Miracle on 34th St. Ernest Saves Christmas. A Charlie Brown Christmas. The Polar Express. Well that’s a start anyhow.
#8. Take Advantage of Your Local Happenings.
You can do a minimal amount of research and figure out what town is having whatever holiday shenanigans and then go find one and participate. Take your kids to see Christmas lights. Go to the theme parks, they’re all decorated to the nines. Check a crowd calendar and find the right day. Go see a movie in a park. Run a Turkey Trot 5k on Thanksgiving. Watch a boat parade.
#9. Be the Weird Neighbor.
Don’t second guess the odd decorations in your yard. Put them up. Those are the houses we want to see anyhow right? Just get rid of those green and red laser lights. That’s lazy….you know it is.
#10. Listen to Podcasts.
You’ve got some time off. You’re gonna be untangling Christmas lights anyway so you might as well put on a podcast (this one perhaps?) and catch up. You may listen to it and enjoy it so much you’ll find yourself over at www.floridasisinking.com/patreon wanting to sign up and be a patron. Who knows?
Bah Humbug and a “Keep the change ya filthy animals” to all of you. -IJ
